Going To The Dogs
The odyssey of growing old in the 21st Century America has developed some novel humiliations.
Today’s aging Ulysses, for example, must face an historical role reversal. In ages past one’s graying hair was mark of a man who people would come to for hard earned and valuable wisdom. Now we come to our children and grandchildren for guidance in how to operate the new remote.
Here’s another classical reference to ancient Greece. You remember the riddle of the Sphynx posed to Oedipus? I have an updated version.
A man wakes in the morning thinking that this day will be similar to yesterday, and tomorrow. The foolish man thought he had bought at least 30 days of normalcy. A phone call at noon from his beloved, and a meeting is arranged for midafternoon. At sunset a rescue is accomplished. Under a darkening winter sky he drives out of the PetSmart parking lot.
What has happened in five short hours? Answer: We have a new four-legged puppy for us to walk with on our two legs.
Shift forward seven days. “There are sure a lot of dogs around here.” Thus observed my trainer for the third time. Yes that’s Park Hill for you. You might say the woof is woven into our community so much so that you might not even notice the commonplace appearance of a large number of dogs and their human walkers constantly in motion on our sidewalks. It is a vast subculture supported by Park Hill businesses for grooming, veterinary service and a pet supply store all within a few minutes’ walk. Water dishes line the business section’s sidewalks and homemade poopbag dispensers on many corners are a blessing.
I re-entered this world on the wings of an Angel. Gabriel is an eight-month old golden retriever puppy. With him we hit the jackpot. As it turns out, all the training needed was for us humans. We are a breed notoriously hard to train.
As it happens, the more I learn about dogs the more I learn about myself. I am taught how to use the obedience commands already installed, and guess what? I realize that I will have to retrain myself since the commands I normally give (preprogrammed in a less enlightened period of suburban dog ownership) are basically confusing to the dog.
It’s like if every time I should hit the brake when driving I am hitting the horn instead. Understanding what to do is not enough, because in the moment of canine crisis, I still issue my usual confusing commands. This will really take practice and time and patience. Maybe there is something of value I can pass on to my grandkids after all.
There is a lot at stake here. I am part of a man/dog relationship that goes back at least 12,000 years to the Pleistocene! Pretty heady stuff. It’s also another excuse to buy books. I bought three, OK, four books on dog behavior and psychology. Three of them were obtained with credits from our neighborhood Park Hill Bookstore, where you can bone up on dog language, psychology, behavior, evolution and training. It’s exciting to think of all the opportunities our neighborhood offers for observation and interaction with other dogs and their dog lovers.
Of course owning a dog in Park Hill usually means many miles put in along the sidewalks, and lots of opportunities to meet and socialize with neighbors. Dogs are allowed in many of the local businesses, and during sunny weather they lounge around the curbside patios. Add in the health benefits of regular walking for everyone involved and it’s another reason to be grateful for our community.
One last observation from the training exercises: For a dog there is little freedom without the discipline of training. If the dog is under their master’s control then in lawful areas they can enjoy the freedom to run and play, if they are not under control they will have to be leashed or enclosed.
It was another wily Greek named Aristotle who observed, “through discipline comes freedom.” Probably also helps make one be a better grandpa and neighbor.
Neil Funsch has been a mortgage broker for 19 years, the last eight in Park Hill. He can be reached at 303-229-2684 or neil.funsch@gmail.com.